Reflection on October 24, 1984

https://www.ewtn.com/library/PAPALDOC/jp2tb123.htm

“Conjugal chastity (and chastity in general) is manifested at first as the capacity to resist the concupiscence of the flesh. It later gradually reveals itself as a singular capacity to perceive, love and practice those meanings of the language of the body which remain altogether unknown to concupiscence itself.” The world sees chastity as closing a door to something. It is true that the choice to remain chaste, either for periods of time in a marriage or all the time outside of marriage, closes a door to the conjugal act. But SJPII is saying that this choice opens a door to a much fuller understanding of love and the capacity to love. I don’t think there is any argument that the more we move towards the acceptance and promotion of sex outside of marriage and use of contraception, the less true love we see in the world. The less we see of a truly giving love, a sacrificing love, a lifelong love, a love that can survive struggles and challenges.

The idea of a love like that between two people is disappearing. It is being replaced by the idea that a couple may be together for a while and they may find benefit in the other for a period of time, but when that seems to have been used up, the couple should just go their own ways. It is a utilitarian view of relationships, it is how we view a person in a contract, and it is how we view equipment or our phone. It is not meant to be the way we view other humans and especially not the way to view your spouse. But the world is pushing for this view because to the world everything and everyone is simple another resource that is expendable when its purpose it accomplished. When its cost is higher than its production, it is time to let it go. You can see how quickly a theology that the unity out of the conjugal act and sees a marriage as a utility quickly forms into a society where unwanted fetuses are disposed of, where elderly are euthanized to save money, and the envelope can and will be pushed further as God is pushed further and further away. Choosing chastity allows us to step back from the world and strengthens our resolve to control our impulses.